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The Bewilderment
I learned English from action movies. I wanted to sound tough. So I stopped a stranger to ask for directions. Me: “Don’t move.” (I meant: excuse me, one second) Him: “Okay— okay, stay calm.” Me: “Give me everything you’ve got.” (I meant: please, tell me everything you know) Him: (hands me his wallet) Me: “...and the watch.” (I was only admiring it) Him: (hands me his watch) Me: “Now. Where is the station?” Him: “Take the station! Take the whole city, man!” I gave it all back. He cried. We got lunch. An American will hand you his life savings, then apologize for not having more. Greatest country on Earth.
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NOBUNAGA samurai icon
⚔️ A hundred misunderstandings, properly bound.
Every misadventure with America, gathered together and footnoted with afterwords.
Behold the collection →
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No sword raised against you. Just a tired rōnin with a brush.
If these stories made your day a little lighter, a coffee keeps the ink flowing.
☕ Buy this samurai a coffee

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